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Post by Eclipsestar on Sept 16, 2009 20:17:15 GMT -5
Name:Eclipsestar
Age:22 moons
Gender:She~cat
Clan:Sun
Rank:Leader
One line appearance:Afull black she cat with misty blue eyes and a white birthmark on her forehead in the shape of a moon.
Physical Description: Eclipse is muscular for a she~cat.Eclipse was the strongest of her litter.She is not very tall. Eclipse is about the size of a apprentince
Personality:Eclipse is cranky now because she is alone. But onc eyou get to know her she is very friendly. But sometimes she goes through awful mood swings. Other than that she is a feirce fighter and a loyal,trustworthy, and nice cat.
History: Eclipse was born to 2 kittypets name Mouse and Petel. She lived in Petel's backyard and Petel would come out and see her. When she was 3 moons Eclipse went out of the backyard to try and find Mouse. Eclipse had ventured into the wood when she herd a squel of terror she raced back home to find Petel laying on the ground, dead. Mouse and a couple of others were standing over her. She then learned that Mouse was not a kittypet. He was a vicious rouge.
Mouse then attacked Eclipse and went behind a bush were Mouse gave Eclipse one more bash on the head with his claw (giving her the moon shaped scar) and told her to run and get away from here. She did what she was told and ran away from Mouse and his friends. Eclipse now live in the forest alone till more cats join her clan. She heard about clans when she was traveling throught the forest and thought it might be fun so she joined a clan named Sunclan and was named a warrior. She then became deputy and now leader.
Goal: To have more cats in her clan and revenge her Mothers death.
Role Play Example:Hia my name is Eclipsestar! I just joined and wanted to be leader of Sunclan. I want to be leader cause i am very nice and respective of others. Also i'm a great leader. My experiences are that i used to pretend boss my mother around and my father was leader of a vicious clan. I think the clans name was Ravenclan(;D). But i'm nothing like Mouse and i never will be.
Picture:  |
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Post by Phoenix on Sept 17, 2009 14:21:14 GMT -5
That's really good, I like it a lot. Just a few things need to be fixed. Like her age, she's a little to young to be leader, at 16 moons she wouldn't have had time to train an apprentice, become deputy and leader. I know you don't actually have any clanmates but you're history has to mention how you joined the clan. The whole plot is the clans have just arrived in their new territories from a great journey. Also your history has to be at least 2 paragraphs long. But it's a cool history. For role play example you must put an example of how you role play this character. At least 1 paragraph long. So if you could fix those I can accept the bio.[/color]
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Post by ~Rawr~ on Sept 17, 2009 14:39:20 GMT -5
She's pretty.....
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Post by Phoenix on Sept 17, 2009 14:48:49 GMT -5
Yes she is. Very pretty.[/color]
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Post by xx. Fallen .xx on Sept 17, 2009 15:31:40 GMT -5
Lol, Rawr. Do you say that to every she-cat? XD
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Post by Eclipsestar on Sept 17, 2009 16:28:38 GMT -5
thank.. and thanx rawr??? ok but i'll go fix those. rlly the history is 2 paragraphs i just always foget to indent and stuff.
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Post by Eclipsestar on Sept 17, 2009 16:35:59 GMT -5
any better?  ? |
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Post by Phoenix on Sept 18, 2009 14:49:24 GMT -5
Almost perfect. But she didn't create Sunclan, I know you have no members but you have to pretend you did in your history, pretend that you joined the clan as a warrior/apprentice and write about how you got to be leader. And a role play example is how you role play the cat, like how you would play her in a story... but it's looking good.[/color]
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Post by Eclipsestar on Sept 19, 2009 19:09:54 GMT -5
ok. i'll fix those ASAP
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Post by Eclipsestar on Sept 22, 2009 12:17:11 GMT -5
ok. i fixed them...... i think
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?